Recently I overheard a conversation between a mother and son. The son telling his mother that kissing meant nothing these days, and the mother saying that a kiss meant so much. This is a blog so I get to throw my own opinion around and you all can read it or not.
Why has a kiss degraded itself to nothing? Surely it isn't the fault of the kiss itself. The lazy response might be something along the lines of "times are changing" or "its just what our generation does". It isn't. I have talked to many people over the years, and I have been told that they just need to kiss the other person to know if things will work out, or if things are right. I have been told that kissing or making out is no big deal, almost as if it is a pass time, I have even been told that kissing should only happen when you are seriously committed to the one you are dating and then it shouldn't be passionate kissing, because passionate kissing leads to other things. I have been told many things on a wide spectrum. Here is what I think.
Kissing is good. As an action can speak much louder than saying "I love you" 3 words that I don't think are said enough, nor said with meaning when they are said. What even is love? The dictionary defines it as an intense feeling of deep affection. My personal experience with thoughts of love are; not wanting to be apart from someone no matter the consequences, a willingness to serve and put their needs and desires above your own, and probably more important than any of that, really striving to make that other person feel like they matter, and have value in your eyes. In short trying to leave the other person in a better state than you found them. Not as a project, but as someone that really actually matters to you.
Off of my little side track there, imagine putting all of that thought and feeling into a kiss. It doesn't have to mean everything that everybody else tells you it means, but at the very least it should mean something. I have heard stories of people trading kisses like they might trade dessert in a grade school lunch room. It is sad to me personally at least to see that kind of a thing go on, because if it means that little now what will change its meaning in the future?
My thoughts are something like this... When you think about going in for that next kiss, wait. Think for a second. What does this mean to me? What does this mean to them? Am I looking forward to being in a relationship with this person? Are they with me? How much is my kiss worth? If we look at kisses like the government does money and we just keep on rolling them out without thought, what will our kisses be worth when the worth really matters? When we get married... When we kiss our children good night before they go to bed... When we move into the future do we want to be rich or poor? What is the value of a relationship? I don't say this to stop people from moving forward with relationships, but rather to think about what you are putting into them.
so just wait for a second. think for a second.
do everything with a purpose. hearts are not toys to be played with. many are more fragile than your mom's fancy china that she pulls out for Thanksgiving and Christmas, and all are of countless worth.
then if you can think about all of that with a clear conscience, enjoy your kiss.
Why has a kiss degraded itself to nothing? Surely it isn't the fault of the kiss itself. The lazy response might be something along the lines of "times are changing" or "its just what our generation does". It isn't. I have talked to many people over the years, and I have been told that they just need to kiss the other person to know if things will work out, or if things are right. I have been told that kissing or making out is no big deal, almost as if it is a pass time, I have even been told that kissing should only happen when you are seriously committed to the one you are dating and then it shouldn't be passionate kissing, because passionate kissing leads to other things. I have been told many things on a wide spectrum. Here is what I think.
Kissing is good. As an action can speak much louder than saying "I love you" 3 words that I don't think are said enough, nor said with meaning when they are said. What even is love? The dictionary defines it as an intense feeling of deep affection. My personal experience with thoughts of love are; not wanting to be apart from someone no matter the consequences, a willingness to serve and put their needs and desires above your own, and probably more important than any of that, really striving to make that other person feel like they matter, and have value in your eyes. In short trying to leave the other person in a better state than you found them. Not as a project, but as someone that really actually matters to you.
Off of my little side track there, imagine putting all of that thought and feeling into a kiss. It doesn't have to mean everything that everybody else tells you it means, but at the very least it should mean something. I have heard stories of people trading kisses like they might trade dessert in a grade school lunch room. It is sad to me personally at least to see that kind of a thing go on, because if it means that little now what will change its meaning in the future?
My thoughts are something like this... When you think about going in for that next kiss, wait. Think for a second. What does this mean to me? What does this mean to them? Am I looking forward to being in a relationship with this person? Are they with me? How much is my kiss worth? If we look at kisses like the government does money and we just keep on rolling them out without thought, what will our kisses be worth when the worth really matters? When we get married... When we kiss our children good night before they go to bed... When we move into the future do we want to be rich or poor? What is the value of a relationship? I don't say this to stop people from moving forward with relationships, but rather to think about what you are putting into them.
so just wait for a second. think for a second.
do everything with a purpose. hearts are not toys to be played with. many are more fragile than your mom's fancy china that she pulls out for Thanksgiving and Christmas, and all are of countless worth.
then if you can think about all of that with a clear conscience, enjoy your kiss.
